BENNY'S BLOG

We did it! We hooked 100 episodes of the Big Fish Cares podcast ! What a long journey this has been for a passion project that started as a way to help other business owners like me. To celebrate our centennial episode, we welcomed no other than Gino Wickman , founder of the Entrepreneurial Operating System® (EOS®) and so much more. Gino came on to share some more insight into the revelations he had that prompted him to write his latest book, Shine , and start the Shed and Shine podcast with Rob Dube. Episode 100- How to Balance Ambition and Inner Peace as an Entrepreneur Understanding Your Shit Have you ever felt like you were “too much” for the people around you? Many entrepreneurs learn to fold in pieces of their personality, dim their light, or play small to better fit into school systems, workplaces, or social circles. Gino calls this the cocoon. While meant to protect us, we end up smashing down feelings while understanding the traumas weighing us down. Discovery 1: I am driven. I had boundless energy as a kid and young adult, and I still do. I move at a speed and with an endurance that most can’t match. Research says only 10% of the population has this genetic “blessing/curse.” And only 3-4% of the population are driven entrepreneurs. The rest are usually highly driven athletes, salespeople, Navy Seals, or stockbrokers. (Interestingly, only ~5% of the general population have adult ADHD …coincidence?) Are you one of the few? Gino calls this a blessing and a curse. The blessing for people who are driven is that seemingly endless energy. The curse? People who are driven also do a lot of mental, physical, and emotional damage to themselves and others around them. Driven entrepreneurs don’t have the same dopamine hit as others from achieving a goal, which means they’re addicted to more and more endorphin hits. Addicts use different things to numb the pain. Driven entrepreneurs tend to be the hardest on themselves, especially when making decisions. Homework: Read Driven by Dr. Douglas Brackman and Rocket Fuel Discovery 2: All decisions are made out of love or fear. After listening to Gino describe this discovery, I understood how many of us make decisions dozens of times a day by reacting out of fear. We fear the embarrassment of being discovered as a fraud or that people will judge us by whatever skeletons we hide in our closets. So we armor up and thicken the walls of those cocoons with alcohol, drugs, or whatever other addictions numb our pain and give us the illusion of feeling safe. Plus, driven entrepreneurs tend to be incredibly curious, risk-taking people. You know the old saying, “Curiosity killed the cat.” Well, our curiosity may not have killed us, but it definitely got us into more trouble (read trauma) than the average person. But, if we make decisions based out of love, we shed those layers to reveal our true selves. Gino said that when we make decisions based out of love, we don’t feel the dread or excitement that the ego gives us. Instead, we feel nothing. For a driven entrepreneur, this can sound profoundly counterintuitive. Homework: Read Untethered Soul by Michael Singer and Ego is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday Discovery 3: It is possible to be driven and have peace. I don’t know about you, but I tend to be an all-or-nothing kind of guy. I go hard and do everything I can to have an impact on the world. But in the past that has been at my own expense to my health and well-being. I used to believe that the other side (the love, peace, and inner calm woo-woo shit) wasn’t for me. I was too driven. Gino found, though, that it is possible to create balance and have both. Obtaining an enlightened state with inner peace won’t dull your edge as an entrepreneur. Gino says it actually makes that edge stronger and helps people vibrate at a higher frequency. He coined the term FLOWt™ (a combination of flow and float) to label that sensation.

I have spent the last few days in prayer and contemplation and it’s been really tough but at the same time an eye-opening experience for me. I want to start by speaking directly to those of you who were hurt or triggered by my recent podcast episode #99 that I have already taken down. I’m truly sorry for the pain I caused. I know now my decision to give this guest a platform and share a difficult story was careless and reckless, and I didn’t think strongly enough about how it might affect victims and family members of unthinkable acts. Some have pointed out that this could be seen as a tacit endorsement, and I want to clarify that this was never my intention.

If we’re lucky, in our lifetimes our paths cross with real-life angels. Like shooting stars, they light up the lives of everyone they come in contact with… and they leave us too soon. John Ruhlin was one of those shooting stars. Even though I only knew him for a short time, I was lucky enough to have felt the awe and “love bombs” from his brilliance. Every time he sent a message, he would sign off with a heart emoji and a bomb emoji. He always wanted to send people heart bombs. John wasn’t just a generous person. He made you feel seen. Important. Valued. And he encouraged you to do the same for others. John knew that everything in life came down to relationships and emotional connection. He once said that when you make people feel something, they’ll remember you. They’ll seek you out to do business with you, become ambassadors of your brand, and go out of their way to make sure you win. Through his company, Giftology , he encouraged others to do the same. John and I were introduced through Facebook by a mutual friend. We got on a call and hit it off right away like old friends. John told me a little bit about his business, but he really cared more about me and my story. At the end of our conversation, he asked me for my address. I thought that was strange, but a short time later, I received a package from him with a copy of his book, Giftology . Only John never just sent a book. He made everything he did a whole experience. So, he’d sent his book in the most beautiful box. When I opened the box, he had a personalized video commemorating everything we’d talked about during that call. He’d created such an emotional experience for me that it melted my face off. Who takes the time to send something like that? John did. And he created a business helping others make the people in their lives feel special. The more I thought about it, the more I understood this was what he was put on this earth to do. Not long ago, I was doing a webinar for The Arena Mastermind with Gary Vee . I mentioned John and Giftology when Gary was talking about sending clients surprise-and-delight gifts. Later, I shared the clip with John. He was so appreciative and posted it on LinkedIn . That was the last post he ever made. I never met John’s wife and four beautiful daughters, but he talked about them constantly. I knew how much they meant to him and how he wanted to travel less and spend more time with them. I never met John in person, either. Actually, I’d just bought plane tickets to go to St. Louis to do a podcast with him on August 20 when I heard the news of his sudden passing. Like everyone who knew John, I was devastated. I wanted to use Giftology’s services to surprise and delight the people in my business. John wanted to get started right away, but I was dragging my feet. We were finally going to hash out my whole gifting program and what I wanted to do when I went to interview him. Only he left us too soon. I wish I’d acted faster on these things. I wish I’d gone earlier to meet John. I wish I’d been a better friend to him during the short time that I knew him. John’s faith was paramount to him. He emulated Jesus's teachings and modeled them through his life and business. Almost like Jesus, John was only here for a short time but did so much while he was with us on earth. I believe Jesus sent John as an angel down to earth as a gift. Heaven took John back so early, so we wouldn’t forget the emotional impact he had on our lives. After all, John’s birthday was March 16 (3/16) . John 3:16 : “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” John once said : You’ll never regret giving more than is reasonable. Love others how they want to be loved. There are no accidents; we’re all here on purpose. Clearly John was put here on purpose to make an impact on thousands and thousands of the most influential people in the world. He inspired everyone he met to give and give and give. That’s how we can honor John and ensure his legacy lives on. I pledge to make a positive impact on the people in my life. Now. Today. Because John has shown us that you can be young and in excellent health, but tomorrow is never guaranteed. How will you impact on the people in your life? To help his family as they grieve the loss of this amazing angel, please consider donating to the GoFundMe page set up to support them.

As I Meet Roofing Contractors Nationwide, I'm Always Amazed by Their Stories.

Last May, I was at VeeCon in Indianapolis with my video content team. It's a trip we take every year, but that time, I met a street artist named Robin Hoodd. This wasn't just a chance meeting. It has been a moment that has stuck with me ever since.

It was back in the nexus of 2012 and 2013 when the world of marketing began to captivate my professional curiosity.